Cracking the Code of Cunnilingus

Even with an internet teeming with dweebs anxious to share their entire life story, there is a lack of functional sexual advice from real world professionals.

So here goes.

A hack to heterosexual men’s greatest sexual adversary and potential ally: cracking the code of cunnilingus.

First things first men. Your girl wants you to go down on her. Like a LOT. (Assuming you’re good.)

How do you know if you’re good?

Ask yourself honestly the duration she let’s you stay down there. Does she stop you before she orgasms?

That’s a strong sign that you’re not blowing her mind. And I’m NOT sharing my secrets so you can go back to having mediocre sex.

We’re aiming for you to be the fucking Bruce Lee of pussy eating.

So unless she’s climaxing in your mouth and waking up your kids, (or telling you to put one in her) you ain’t doing it right.

*Side note if you find yourself constantly opposed to performing oral on your partner maybe it’s time to reassess the partner?

Particularly for those in committed relationships, sexual satisfaction is consistently shown essential to relationship health.

So if you want your communion to last, my best advice is to develop a late night and early morning appetite.

That brings us to our pillars of performance:

  1. Check your energy at the bedroom door– Before you even think of diving below the equator it’s essential you develop a hunger for sexual satisfaction. Start with drumming up your own desires and getting it touch with your mojo. Good lovers have sexual swagger. Nobody wants a dial tone or a dispassionate lover. Figure out what gets your juices flowing and reintroduce that excitement and enthusiasm back into your romantic life. Remember being a horny teenager? We want that playful (but less confused) attitude.
  2. Treat each meal like its your last– The best of life is hidden within the ordinary. Like how much more would you appreciate your last bowl of ice cream EVER than just last nights? You might savor the experience just a moment longer, or pause to reflect at how damn delicious cookies and cream actually tastes. Each bite begins to have more meaning. Brings clarity. That’s how sensitive one should be towards a freshly thawed vagina. Practice focusing by becoming a more mindful eater and through attention and participation eventually you’ll develop more conscious cunnilingus.
  3. SLOW DOWN GRASSHOPPER– The biggest mistake woman communicate men make is that they treat the very clitoral celebration like penial pastimes. This isn’t a piece of meat you’re slapping on the grill, it’s sushi grade filet and deserves your proper preparation and consideration. You can’t just walk up in there like you own the place. Make a proper introduction. TAKE YOUR TIME. Say hello. Whisper sweet nothings and peak her interest. Like any cat, you have to persuade pussy properly. Otherwise she’s unlikely to get comfortable and show her true nature. Consider this: you’ve had a ‘bad’ blowjob (YES it’s possible) right? How do you fuck up a blowjob? The same way you fuck up vaginal oral, it’s either too aggressive or too rushed.
  4. Most Valuable Pussy-If you’re willing and or able to go down on your girl might as well make it worth her (and your) while. Now since you’re going to be the MAN when it comes to WOMAN make sure she understands how you feel about her. That she KNOWS you don’t want to be down anywhere or with anyone else than firmly entrapped between her luscious labia lips. If you’re a dirty fuck you might even tell her about it while you’re down there. But don’t take my words for it..
  5. Science of Art- You’ll never know what to do with it unless you’re familiar with it. Behind all great artists are great scientists. In other words they know their medium. Sharpening skills happens by education and repetition. I can’t help you with the latter, but all that’s needed for a better understanding of female reproduction is closer examination. You’re not a snake. Licking air isn’t gonna give you loads of information. You need to get in there to investigate. Angles, pressure, fingers, noses. Get intimate with her tool and the tools at your disposal. Remember: if you’re having fun and making it interesting, maybe she’s having fun and interested.
  6. Two ears two lips– If there is a fundamental lesson for how to improve the male/female relationship it probably has to do with men becoming better listeners and communicators. In my experience woman are crystal clear on what they want sexually, often their man isn’t coachable. It’s probably the muchismo or the ego that makes us think we know what woman want (example:A) but not until we let our more feminine qualities show can we understand the feminine glow. Don’t be afraid to take advice or suggestions of why what you’re doing isn’t working (which it isn’t). She’ll thank you later.
  7. Cum is for closers. Unless you’re mentally prepared to go all the way, she won’t. Championships are not won without exceptional effort and perseverance. It will take all of your physical, mental and emotional dedication to take her past the point of (wanting to) return. If that’s intimidating, this might not be the work for you, but if you’re willing to sacrifice literal blood, sweat and tears to satisfy yourself and others than you already possess the most essential unteachable characteristic. Love. Without affection for who and what you do, you’ll never feel what you’re looking for.
  8. WHAT SHE SAID– I’m not a woman. Ask one.

Oral sex is a fun, free, entertaining and enjoyable human experience.

PLEASE ENJOY RESPONSIBLY.

 

 

Peace,

 

Wongi

@iamwongi

 

 

 

 

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